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Natalia's avatar

Hey Scott, just wondering whether you have anything to say about the energy of cannabis in relation to liminal periods of transformation?

I have been a fairly regular cannabis smoker for most of the past 8 years (about 1-2 times a week). It has always been a useful tool for increasing my self awareness. Especially after emotionally intense periods of life - it seems to relax me enough to have moments of clarity and insight, and basically see that “I’m ok”.

Since committing to the consciousness path and all the corresponding shifts, the effects of cannabis have evolved - much more body sensitivity and more pronounced insights. This was exciting for some time.

I am currently at a fairly fragile point in my journey (recently entered the 400s in MOC - don’t know if any elements of my experience are ubiquitous for that stage?) where the emotionality surrounding my fears have subsided enough that I now find it impossible to not take on certain challenges which previously seemed scary and impossible for me. I think my nervous system has not yet caught up with my intention so it’s going into overdrive regularly which sometimes leads to dorsal shutdown.

I noticed that I started using cannabis as a crutch when this phase started, which bothered me. I’m now trying to manage by setting more boundaries around when I use it - to force myself to “naturally” build the nervous system capacity i seem to require.

Would love to hear if any of this resonates with your experience.

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Danique van de Kerkhof's avatar

Thanks SO much for sharing this. I can recognize a lot of my own experiences in your story. I've been on a spiritual journey since I was healed from epilepsy by a brain surgery. Because I had overcome this frightening disease, I felt like I was given a new life and had literally nothing to lose.

Since then, I started to really question the meaning of my life and what I should be doing on this planet. I started to experiment with meditation and psychedelics, and since then there was no way back. It felt like for the first time in my life I saw the truth. I felt unconditionally love. I really saw the universe and felt part of it.

It also made me much more sensitive. At first I thought there was something wrong with me. I would be overwhelmed all the time by sounds, people with "heavy energies", and the emotions that would bubble up in my chest randomly. It is exactly that feeling you describe of experiencing emotions that don't seem to be your own. I still have a hard time dealing with it and sometimes I wish that I could turn it off. On the other side, I would not want to trade it because it has given me the depth of experiencing life as it is.

I'm really looking forward to your other article!

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